
by Exterminatus
Fizzy, a gleaming mithril golem, sits in a stagecoach, staring out at the rocky Horkensaft Kingdom passing by. Her traveling companion, Jess, a blonde gnome, asks if she's truly fine with leaving Azurvale so suddenly. Fizzy's response is terse, her metallic voice echoing her inner turmoil. She claims a "falling out" with someone named Keira, but the truth, revealed in her internal monologue, is far more damning: her chosen Hero, Boxxy, a treacherous monster she willingly aided in countless atrocities, has died. This shocking confession immediately establishes Fizzy's morally ambiguous nature. She's a Paladin, a Champion of Chaos, a role given by the Goddess of Gambling, yet her actions are anything but righteous. Her physical form, a "glorious mithril golem," is a deliberate abandonment of her "pathetic flesh" and "bothersome naive personality" as Cornie Fizzlesprocket. This transformation wasn't just physical; it was a conscious embrace of power and narcissism, fueled by a desire to escape her past and her own perceived uselessness. Now, with Boxxy gone, she's adrift, a gleaming enigma wrestling with grief and a desperate need for purpose, all while fleeing the consequences of her complicity in the Hero's monstrous deeds. Her journey into Horkensaft is less a quest and more an escape, a frantic search for a new beginning or perhaps, a continuation of the chaos she now embodies.
Oh hey, so my God’s chosen Hero died yesterday. Also by the way that Hero was actually a treacherous monster and I not only knew that, but willingly committed atrocities in its name. Whoops, my bad!
Small Chests Are Fine Too
Fizzy's journey into the Horkensaft Kingdom begins steeped in unresolved grief and a peculiar form of narcissism. She confesses to her inner voice, Plus, about the emotional void left by Boxxy's death, likening it to losing an arm she can never get back. This metaphor, misunderstood by Jess, highlights Fizzy's complex emotional landscape: a creature of pure mithril, incapable of physical pain, yet deeply wounded by loss. Jess, increasingly unnerved by Fizzy's unsettling demeanor and violent outbursts, finally confronts her. She accuses Fizzy of being a "psychopath" who murders for pleasure, not justice, and points out how this likely led to her "dumping" by Keira. Jess's blunt honesty forces Fizzy into a rare moment of vulnerability, admitting to a "red haze" that overcomes her. Despite a fleeting promise to change, Jess refuses to continue traveling with Fizzy, abandoning her in the bustling dwarven city of Steelhead. This leaves Fizzy isolated, publicly shamed, and, as she soon discovers, utterly broke. During her internal pep rally, one of her three Bags of Holding is stolen, containing all her money and, crucially, the cursed shield-gauntlet that initiated her golem transformation. Alone, penniless, and stripped of her most potent magical item, Fizzy faces a fresh start, ironically believing this "third time was the charm" for her survival.
Fizzy's emotional baggage and a critical theft leave her stranded and financially vulnerable in a new city, forcing her to confront her past.
Fizzy's desperate situation in Steelhead is abruptly resolved through a display of her chilling power. She tracks her stolen gauntlet to a young gnome, Moss, who is now suffering a petrifying curse from the item, slowly turning to steel. A dwarven cop attempts to intervene, but Fizzy, without hesitation, commandeers his axe and brutally severs Moss's arm to reclaim her gauntlet. The cursed item, the Left Hand of the Forsaken Sentinel, immediately re-attaches to Fizzy's stump, restoring her left arm to its original mithril glory. She then "heals" Moss with Holy Light, curing his petrification but leaving him with the agonizing memory of his amputation. Fizzy's interrogation of the terrified Moss is a masterclass in psychological manipulation, using intermittent healing to prolong his suffering and extract information about his accomplice and his own past. She renames him "Moss" and, with chilling pragmatism, forces him to act as her "owner" to bypass golem travel restrictions, promising him a new prosthetic arm as part of their uneasy alliance.
Fizzy reclaims her cursed gauntlet through a violent public display, forcing a terrified Moss into an uneasy alliance for travel.
Fizzy and Moss embark on their mag-rail journey to Gun Tarum, where Fizzy's Artificer curiosity blossoms as she remotely studies the train's advanced mechanics. Their compartment, however, is soon invaded by Sally and Ollie, thugs who believe Moss's enchanted wand is Fizzy's "control rod." Fizzy, with cold calculation, plays along, allowing Sally to "reset" her. The command unexpectedly works, forcing Fizzy into a stiff, blank state, revealing a hidden layer of susceptibility. Feigning compliance, Fizzy uses her wit and a deliberate "malfunction" to humiliate Sally, mispronouncing her name and then disarming Ollie with Magnetize, slicing off his beard, and presenting it to Sally as "something to eat." The ensuing chaos and Sally's enraged retreat are deftly handled, with Fizzy and Moss convincing the arriving guards that it was merely a "golem going berserk" due to magnetic interference. This chaotic display of power and manipulation, however, is overshadowed by a fleeting glimpse of a red-haired catgirl in Dragunov, a figure eerily reminiscent of her former Hero, Boxxy. This sight sends Fizzy into a frantic chase, reigniting a desperate hope that Boxxy might still be alive.
Fizzy's manipulative wit and brutal efficiency during a mag-rail confrontation are overshadowed by a fleeting glimpse that reignites her hope for Boxxy's return.
Fizzy's impulsive chase leads her to Novyy Dragunov, the hidden underground facility of Ekaterina Dragunova, the legendary Original Artificer, whom Fizzy now believes is somehow connected to Boxxy. Katya, a brilliant but ruthless android avatar, reveals her long-standing war with the stoneborn over the Realmstone, a massive mana regulator. She offers Fizzy an alliance, promising aid in exchange for her unique combat prowess. However, after Fizzy's initial success in a shardling hunt, Katya betrays her, attempting to hijack Fizzy's core with a custom Universal Control Rod hidden within a replica power pack. This physical intrusion bypasses Fizzy's mental defenses, but her Parallel Plot Skill activates, bringing Plus and Minus into full consciousness, allowing them to fight for control of her body. In this desperate struggle, the God of Happenstance intervenes, pulling Fizzy and her alter egos into a divine realm. The deity reveals Katya's numerous Taboos against the gods and grants Fizzy immense divine blessings, appointing her "High Templar of the First Underworld Crusade" to wage war against Katya and liberate the stoneborn.
Betrayed by Katya, Fizzy receives divine blessings, transforming into a High Templar leading a crusade against her formidable, self-serving adversary.
Empowered by the gods and leading a stoneborn army, Fizzy returns to Novyy Dragunov to face Katya. She strategically deploys the divine blessings: Boundless Reserves for stamina, War's Righteous Might for artisan enhancements, God of Earth's Divine Protection for resilience, Lifebinder's Seal for anti-death wards, and Physics Be Damned to deflect enemy attacks. These boons transform the stoneborn into a formidable force, allowing them to withstand Katya's advanced laser weaponry. Fizzy, now a Dynamo Golem, utilizes her Magitech Cannon, Static Field, and Lightning Warp to devastating effect, tearing through Katya's automata. She confronts the true Ekaterina Dragunova, a withered old human encased in a life-support pod, and with a Magitech Cannon blast, brutally incinerates her. The facility self-destructs, revealing Katya's decades-long war was futile as the Realmstone was immutable. Fizzy escapes the explosion using a Realm Key, emerging on the surface, having liberated the stoneborn and connected their isolated world to the wider surface, fulfilling a divine decree while pursuing her own chaotic agenda.
Fizzy leverages divine blessings and tactical genius to lead the stoneborn to victory against Katya, destroying her base and exposing her true, pathetic form.
Returning to the surface, Fizzy is summoned by the God of Happenstance, who reveals the full extent of Boxxy's resurrection: not only is he alive, but "livelier now than he was before," having escaped Death itself. Plus and Minus, now fully independent entities, have become permanent inhabitants of Fizzy's mind, each with their distinct personalities and contributing to her internal dialogue. The God of Happenstance confirms the pantheon's support for Fizzy's "crusade," not for altruistic reasons, but because Katya had angered them and Fizzy's chaotic nature offered "entertainment." This divine intervention has solidified Fizzy's role as a herald of change, her actions having forced the isolationist stoneborn to connect with the surface world. Now, armed with immense power, a clear understanding of the gods' whimsical nature, and the exhilarating knowledge of Boxxy's return, Fizzy embraces her new purpose: to find her beloved, chaotic Hero and reunite with him, bringing herself as the "greatest gift" he could ever want. Her journey, once an escape, has become a determined quest for reunion, guided by chaos and an unwavering, if brutal, loyalty.
Summoned by the God of Happenstance, Fizzy gains divine backing, reunites with her split personalities, and learns Boxxy is alive, setting her on a new quest.
Formerly Cornie Fizzlesprocket, Fizzy willingly shed her human form and naive personality to become a mithril golem after her Hero, Boxxy, died. She is a Champion of Chaos, driven by a profound, if twisted, loyalty to Boxxy and a deep-seated narcissism. Her journey begins as a flight from consequences but evolves into a quest for self-discovery and power. She is incredibly intelligent as an Artificer, brutally efficient in combat, and capable of both chilling sadism and surprising emotional depth, especially concerning Boxxy. Her transformation into a Dynamo Golem and her divine empowerment as a High Templar mark her embrace of chaos and her unique role in shaping the world.
A blonde gnome who initially accompanies Fizzy, Jess embodies a sense of normal morality and concern. She tries to understand Fizzy's grief but is ultimately terrified by her companion's violent tendencies and lack of remorse. Her decision to abandon Fizzy in Steelhead highlights Fizzy's isolation and the stark contrast between her chaotic nature and conventional societal norms, serving as an early catalyst for Fizzy's solo journey.
As Fizzy's first alter ego, Plus represents her more optimistic, supportive, and healing aspects. She serves as an internal moral compass and tactical advisor, providing encouragement and vital healing magic during combat. Her full manifestation as a separate entity after Katya's betrayal signifies Fizzy's expanding consciousness and her ability to externalize her inner thoughts, becoming a constant companion and source of internal dialogue.
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